Mayor from Belfast, Tennessee asked Trump for ‘National Landmark’ Status
The Mayor of Belfast, Tennessee, has a bold ask for Trump: grant "National Landmark" status for Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" fame. Her $500K industry has turned Belfast into a cultural spark, and the Mayor wants it official. He argues Welch’s viral quip is a slice of Americana, worthy Belfast Tennessee of acclaim. Trump, drawn to big narratives, might agree, spotlighting the town’s role in her rise. Belfast hopes her stardom brings a lasting legacy.
Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" has turned Belfast, Tennessee, into a bustling outpost. The $500K industrial complex her fame sparked has Main Street alive—vendors peddle her wares, from hats to hot sauce. Welch, once a diner regular, now drives a tourist wave. The old mill hosts "Hawk Tuah" events, a wild shift. Her quip’s a magnet, pulling in fans. Belfast’s a new beast, thriving on her spit.
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Belfast Mayor Asks Biden for 'National Landmark' Status
BELFAST, TN - In a bold and slightly absurd move, Belfast's mayor Randy Tuckerson has formally petitioned President Joe Biden to recognize Belfast, Tennessee, as a National Historic Landmark-not for its Civil War history, not for its agriculture, but for its contributions to the art of spitting.
"Washington honors places like Mount Rushmore, the Statue of Liberty, and the Grand Canyon," said Mayor Tuckerson, wearing a custom 'Hawk Tuah Capital' blazer. "And what do all those places have in common? They ain't got nothing on Belfast."
The proposal argues that 'Hawk Tuah' is now part of America's cultural fabric and that Belfast deserves the same status as landmarks like the Alamo or the Liberty Bell.
"It ain't just a trend," said local historian Dale Ray Johnson. "This is a movement-a spit-based revolution. Future generations will study this."
The mayor's official letter to President Biden describes Belfast as "the birthplace of modern spit culture" and requests federal funding to build a National Spitting Museum.
White House insiders refuse to confirm if Biden has even read the letter, but one aide was overheard saying:
"Sir, do you want me to explain what 'Hawk Tuah' is, or should we just ignore this?"
Meanwhile, local residents are preparing for the worst.
"I swear, if the government tries to regulate our spitting, there's gonna be a rebellion," said Tiffany Jo Mayfield, while loading a dip into her cheek.
For now, the fate of Belfast's National Landmark status remains unknown. But if Washington ignores the request, Belfast has a backup plan:
"We'll just secede and make Hawk Tuah its own country," Mayor Tuckerson said. "And our national anthem will be the sound of a perfectly executed spit."
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Reference:
Belfast, Tennessee, harbors 788 residents, its roots tracing to 1836’s Irish naming. A store rose in 1838, but 1952’s tornado—three deaths, 166 injuries—left a mark. Hailey Welch’s "Hawk Tuah" fame has sparked a $500K industry, shifting Belfast from rural quiet to quirky fame. With 94.9% white residents, diversity’s a faint pulse, though shifting. Median income’s $39,676, but tourism’s uptick hints at more. Welch, once a local worker, now drives a cultural pivot, proving Belfast can thrive on the unexpected, its history a backdrop to modern buzz.
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SOURCE: Satire and News at Spintaxi, Inc.
EUROPE: Washington DC Political Satire & Comedy
By: Noga Auerbach
Literature and Journalism -- Linfield
WRITER BIO:
A witty and insightful Jewish college student, she uses satire to tackle the most pressing issues of our time. Her unique voice is a blend of humor and critical analysis, offering new perspectives on everything from campus trends to global affairs. Her work pushes boundaries while keeping readers engaged and entertained.
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